We Are What We Prioritize

Our choices reveal what we actually care about

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If you could take only three items out of your burning house, which would you choose?

Wait a minute. Do not answer that. The above question is just to get you in the mood for today’s subject.

I believe there is a large divide between what people advertise as what they value and what they secretly prioritize. We tend not to be honest at all when we assume that lying is harmless. Everyone alive will at some juncture reveal what they deem as the important qualities, ideals, and possessions. Life just happens this way.

One can steadfastly refuse to confess their priorities, but others will figure them out one way or another. People are nosy. You will become labeled, and you probably already have been.

People judge you on what you repeatedly do more than what you say is true. This is one reason why we must speak our truth all the time. This can be hard, but it becomes easy for those who have determined their purpose, and even more importantly, vowed to work every day toward it.

You can tell what a society values by looking at who it pays. So, we can immediately put a line through education on our make-believe list of possible priorities. Celebrities and sports stars—we obviously feel these are more valuable than educators or anyone else I can think of at the moment.

It is easy to say, “We should reduce the obsession with famous people and concentrate more on education.” Everyone says so. Try to imagine someone disagreeing and saying the opposite: “Let us use our resources to pay celebrities and athletes more and cut the funding to education to make that happen.”

No. A person who cares at all for his reputation, and who does not want to be ridiculed until the end of time, would not dare utter such a thing. Yet, we do believe this. On this, the old adage, “actions speak louder than words” is true. Thus, we are all guilty of prioritizing the wrong things.

I am not shaking my finger at everyone else, because I am part of the everyone, too. Yet, enlightenment entered my life and I can see what matters now, clearly. I am trying to be less hypocritical.

My eating habits are something I have yet to conquer. My priorities remain in the wrong order.

To think about how animals are treated and then slaughtered, so we may eat them, is stomach-churning. It makes me sad and angry. Life should count more than that—all life.

I consider myself a progressive thinker in terms of animal mistreatment. Yet, I eat the meat that comes from the killing factories that de-animalize the non-human creatures of this world. It is hard to imagine not eating meat, because it is something that I have always done. So, it is obvious what I prioritize.

Like so many, I desire to lose weight but continue to eat in an unhealthy way. The cakes and other treats are hard to pass up, so I place yummy snacks above weight loss.

There is nothing more indicative of someone’s priorities than what they do with their time. It is the great leveler of our existence. By that, I mean we all are trapped by time and cannot defeat it. In a way, time makes everyone equal and extracts the same price from every individual.

One of the changes I’ve made from my personal “pre-Enlightenment” to now is to be strict and even hostile to those who waste my time. I cannot allow it. Now, there are little things that will always make us do stuff we do not want to, and there are unforeseen distractions out of nowhere, but I refer to anyone who purposely and frequently wastes time.

I have no reservations about telling people what I need them to hear to save precious time. And it is all precious; yours and mine.

Be direct, calm, and assertive. Say something like “I would rather not be part of this because it is harmful to me.” You do not owe folks more than that.

Also, you do not owe the world your soul in pursuit of money. As almost the root of all evil, money might be the number one reason for misplaced priorities. To be more specific, it is the chase for things that money buys that is at the core of society’s skewed, upside-down, prerogatives.

Some money-love we control and can stop, but some of it is required in order to survive. Let’s talk about the latter instead of the former.

Money creates anxiety and causes people to act in ways they would not under different circumstances. The fear of not having the funds one needs makes us lust after those dollars and cents. People behave callously, irrationally, dishonestly, and cruelly.

I am not referring to getting rich here, no. Instead, I have in mind regular people who are not striving to have huge bank accounts and fancy possessions.

It costs so much to be an American, because a comfy lifestyle is considered a birthright. We take for granted having conveniences that are not rights at all.

Starting as a teenager, Americans expect to have a decent car, and as we grow older, we assume having a new car every two years or so is a requirement. College is almost mandatory.

Also, one must own a house to be a full-fledged American. All of the stuff that goes with American citizenship has a price, and that price has been increasing for a long time. I did not even mention weddings and endless other rites that are not free.

We worry about the bank account now, next week, next year, and twenty years from now. It never stops. Due to the money factor, people do outlandish things they would not do otherwise.

We think, “Why did the person get so angry over a little traffic misunderstanding? Why did he curse and gesture like that?”

It is because he is trying to get to work and you slowed him down for a minute or so. If he is late, then he does not get that promotion that allows for the college fund. Without the college fund, all hope is lost.

The woman who looked at you sternly was legitimately seething because you cut in line. You see, she is in a hurry. She has to get home and start working because her job demands it. One carries assignments home, and she has no choice in the matter because she must impress her boss. There have been layoffs, and the boss hinted that those who “go the extra mile” are the only ones who might be safe from unemployment.

So, someone who screams at you and your child for the most insignificant of reasons seems to have their priorities out of order. They should be more civil, but money-lust makes them act insufferably. So, we can trace many problems back to the obsession with dollars.

Try to think about the big picture. The competition that we feel every day will not matter much at all when all our good or bad deeds are tabulated. At the end, we will not even remember promotions won and lost.

Be true to yourself and your priorities. Write them down. Live by them. It is ultimately our fault for the behavior we exhibit, even if we are caught up in this material world of competition. That will not matter, either, at the very end of life.

Remember what counts, slow down, and try to enjoy the time we have that is constantly ticking away.

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