Scientists Ruin Everything

Of Wolves, Men, and Wooly Mammoths

Photo by Michael LaRosa on Unsplash

Have you ever heard of Dire Wolves? They were real animals and larger than average canines. Also, they have been extinct for a long time.

Now, they are back. This was the news circulating among some people I overheard, and then, of course, I confirmed what was said by not reading a Google article that appeared near the top of my page.

“What a cool thing,” I thought inside my noggin. There are a few cooler potentialities out there in fantasy land, but not that many. Although, among candidates in the animal world, re-aliving something that is basically a dog is not super-exciting. I mean, we are not talking something as great as reintroducing a dinosaur or a Wooly Mammoth.

Still, this was good news and a departure from most whispered information about celebrities, wars, and politics. Then, I finally clicked on the story that Google recommended, and this little bright spot in my day turned sour. This is why no one should read anything. Ever.

Some scientist felt the need to remind us that what happened was not actually recreating an extinct animal. No. The blockheads who reported on their landmark achievement merely made a regular wolf with some of his ancestor’s characteristics. These are not Dire Wolves, as they are just somewhat similar.

My day would have gone better if I had simply missed out on this “extra” information I did not need. By the way, I am not a trained member of the science police.

What about you? Would your world collapse without the knowledge that we only have an imitation Dire Wolf and not a real one? You see, if we could relax and set our minds on possibilities, then many of us would begin to ponder different animals and the certainty of their return. Like the Wooly Mammoth, for example.

The belief that a wolf has emerged from the land of extinction to our reality gives us this great gift of assuming a future of seeing great wonders from the past. What a delight that would be. All we really need is that our faith in the wolf story remains strong. Moments of contentment are exactly what some scientist took away from us. And, this occurred for no good reason.

No person is better off after the true nature of the wolf experiment became public news. So, it is back to the grind and bland normalcy. Once again, nothing paradigm-altering happens that is unrelated to robots.

This minor incident in my life reminded me how scientists ruin everything. It is true.

The wolf fiasco offers more proof of the demystification of the world. Who out there will stop and watch a show that is titled “Mysteries of the Unknown,” or something that has both “Ancient” and “Aliens” in the title? There are tons of them out there.

I am fine with admitting that time machines, other dimensions, and alien junk can be fascinating. What if we combine all three? Here goes something to think about: What if aliens are really people from another dimension? Or, it is possible that UFOs are human-piloted time-machines from thousands of years in the future. However, let’s not tarry too much on these subjects lest we get off-track.

Who is there to shoot down every magical or far-fetched idea? Scientists, of course. Leave it to them to honor only the most mundane and uninteresting theories about the Giza Pyramids or the Nazca Lines. These are merely two prominent examples.

Which of the following makes you feel giddier? The Nazca Lines were created to get the attention of aliens and cause them to return to earth, or the Nazca designs simply were ways to remember where to find water? That’s an easy answer.

Every non-academic/non-scientist has very creative solutions to world enigmas. I have listened to plenty of them, and here is one thing none of them were: boring.

As for my most beloved topic, those time machines, there are interesting stories that appear on my screen almost weekly. Many mention anti-matter and how that could lead to time-travel. However, most stories include some quotation from a scientist that punches a giant hole in everything and reduces the story to nothing.

I imagine what the “Nuclear Era” of the last century must have felt like—minus the fear of world annihilation. I was not alive, but it seemed like people were allowed to happily bathe in their wild conjecture about the future of space. There was a whole culture and decorative style that revolved around childlike wonder about the world of the unknown.

This is no more.

I must conclude that we need to balance the unfiltered search for truth with a little of JOMO (Joy of Missing Out). Information is cheap. Most people have issues sorting the fact-based stuff from the almost-certainly false.

There seem to be plenty of scientists around with enough leisure time to comment on every article. Perhaps the world needs more like P.T. Barnum who made a career out of lying to the public in spectacular ways. Politicians do that, but it is never fun.

Do not be one of those who must always bring the conversation back to reality. Seriously. Let others have fun. Think about possibilities. Are scientists always right? Of course the answer is no.

We do not hear the retractions scientists make when they totally misjudge a situation. We just live with the repercussions of nothing fantastical ever taking place. Let’s make the world cool again without any attendant fears of a nuclear hellscape. Who invented and built nuclear weapons, by the way? Yes, that’s right. I bet it was not those useful men and women who simply dreamed of giving us back giant wolves.

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